Holy crap. It's been months since I've posted.
My life has been a whirlwind lately. It's funny, how when you are presented with a pivotal moment in your life, you are also presented with multiple paths -- all of which are very valid choices, and the only thing that you have to do is choose.
No path makes any outstanding promises. No path has a "salvation" sign hanging above it. Nothing that says one path is guaranteed to be more successful than the other.
Just variables. A sea of swirling variables waiting to be gathered up and tasted.
I am at the peak of a decision. The decision of what to do with the rest of my life. My finances have been balanced, and in nine months (should I decide to do so), I can liquidate my assets which would pay off all of my debt and give me enough spending money to take a nice, year long vacation somewhere.
I do not like computers. I am sick and tired of helping people with their computer problems. I thought for a long time that I would like being a penetration tester -- and it's true, hacking computers is fun and at times rewarding. But not what I'm doing with it.
Music is my solace. It's my life and my dream and when I exercise that creativity and when I release my voice into a crowd of people, the static that courses through my veins is more rewarding than all the money in the world (although that would be nice too!!). I can even integrate computers and music. I have knowledge of both -- so why shouldn't I use it? An intimate knowledge and intuitive understanding of computer and information systems would hardly be irrelevant in the musical industry.
I think that if the opportunity arose where I could run with a potentially rewarding and lucrative musical project, I would jump all over it. But I would need to feel like it was right. My gut would have to agree with me, and I would have to throw all of my dedication behind it.
Could I do that? Would I dump a VERY high paying computer job that I hate for a chance to make some music with other professional, driven musicians and record it on an album that would drive a crowd crazy?
You bet your fucking ass.
And I think I'm beginning to grow up.
My life has been a whirlwind lately. It's funny, how when you are presented with a pivotal moment in your life, you are also presented with multiple paths -- all of which are very valid choices, and the only thing that you have to do is choose.
No path makes any outstanding promises. No path has a "salvation" sign hanging above it. Nothing that says one path is guaranteed to be more successful than the other.
Just variables. A sea of swirling variables waiting to be gathered up and tasted.
I am at the peak of a decision. The decision of what to do with the rest of my life. My finances have been balanced, and in nine months (should I decide to do so), I can liquidate my assets which would pay off all of my debt and give me enough spending money to take a nice, year long vacation somewhere.
I do not like computers. I am sick and tired of helping people with their computer problems. I thought for a long time that I would like being a penetration tester -- and it's true, hacking computers is fun and at times rewarding. But not what I'm doing with it.
Music is my solace. It's my life and my dream and when I exercise that creativity and when I release my voice into a crowd of people, the static that courses through my veins is more rewarding than all the money in the world (although that would be nice too!!). I can even integrate computers and music. I have knowledge of both -- so why shouldn't I use it? An intimate knowledge and intuitive understanding of computer and information systems would hardly be irrelevant in the musical industry.
I think that if the opportunity arose where I could run with a potentially rewarding and lucrative musical project, I would jump all over it. But I would need to feel like it was right. My gut would have to agree with me, and I would have to throw all of my dedication behind it.
Could I do that? Would I dump a VERY high paying computer job that I hate for a chance to make some music with other professional, driven musicians and record it on an album that would drive a crowd crazy?
You bet your fucking ass.
And I think I'm beginning to grow up.